Lies estate agents tell (part two)

Two years ago, while flat hunting I wrote this blogpost, listing some of the classic lies estate agents love to tell. We’ve just moved house again and so have had to deal with a whole new batch of the cheeky fibbers. I therefore felt compelled to write a new post highlighting some of the gems …

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Black tights be gone/an ode to opaques

The time has come to retire my opaque tights for the summer. I know it’s hot and I know it might make you feel hot to look at my fabric-covered pins, but I could wear tights all year round. I would. And I have. When I was about 16 I defied convention and wore black …

Things NOT to take to Glastonbury

Whenever I go to a festival I always ask the Internet what to pack, and the Internet usually obliges with handy blogposts and checklists for me to use as inspiration when creating my own list. Over the years I have managed (despite all that faffing around) to screw myself over in some way or the …

The most annoying types of London commuter

Board any London tube train during rush hour and I can guarantee you'll come across one of the following people: The squeeze and leaner There is mathematically and scientifically no room left in the tube carriage. Yet this optimistic opportunist will take a look at the heaving, sweaty, compacted mass of bodies and think "yeaaaaahhh. …

Whatever you do, DON’T tell me to calm down

On International Women's Day 2016, I thought I'd share my two penneth about a well-talked about issue that I feel helps to maintain inequality and bias. Sometimes, in the midst of an argument or a debate, just as I'm getting into the swing of it and saying some really good stuff, I will find myself …

Confessions of a lazy sloth

Here are some things that laziness makes me do: The lazy-person-lean Rather than getting out of bed to get something, reaching out so far that literally only one toe is left in the bed, all the covers are on the floor and the sheet has come loose. Sitting on my bed in a towel for 4,000 years I've …

How do I hate thee orchids… let me count the ways

The annual Orchid Festival at Kew Gardens is coming up over the next few weeks and as a member, I have received a tidal wave of spam about the ghastly things. I thought it was timely therefore to share some of the many reasons that I despise orchids. To begin with, I hate the look …

Lies estate agents tell

Generosities of the truth, from London estate agents… “Garden” A garden in central London is quite frankly irreconcilable with the rest of the country, and indeed PLANET’S, definition of a garden. A garden should be a pretty area filled with flowers and plants, a bird table and a shed, where you can invite friends round …

Diagnosis: Drama queen

This morning I woke up with a pain in my tooth. After poking the tooth a number of times to try and work out what the problem was, the pain got notably worse and the gums around the tooth started to swell up. An hour, and a considerable amount of tooth poking later, the pain …

Ten things worse than Covent Garden Souper Green skinny soup

When I first tried a mouthful of this revolting green sludge I thought to myself “Well knock me down with a feather, this is the god-damn worst thing I have ever tasted. In fact, it’s probably one of the worst things that has ever happened to me.” However, after I’d finished the soup, washed it …